Chris Kluwe Turns Down A White House Invite With Hilarious Letter
The White House won’t get any hang time with the NFL’s most outspoken punter. Former Vikings and current Raiders punter Chris Kluwe, an outspoken advocate of equal rights, was invited to a Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender (LGBT) Pride Reception at the White House on June 13. However, Kluwe said no. Wait. What? Can you do that? Yes, you can (and he did).
See, Kluwe had to decline because the Raiders’ have a mandatory mini-camp which runs June 11-13, as he explained in a hilarious letter which he tweeted out to his Twitter followers. In the letter (published below), Kluwe offers his regrets and a few comedic ways that he might still make the reception (he won’t):
“Dear Mr. President (Or whoever reads these things, I’m sure he’s probably pretty busy (hello underappreciated email answering person!!)),
It is with great regret that I must decline your invitation to attend the Reception at the White House for LGBT Pride Month on June 13. I would really, really, REALLY like to be there, but unfortunately, not even the President of the United States is allowed to supersede an NFL mandatory mini-camp practice (at least insomuch as I understand the new CBA, though I could possibly be mistaken), and as a current member of the Oakland Raiders I owe it to both my teammates and my coaches to be fully prepared for the upcoming season.
I am tremendously grateful for the opportunity though and if anything else were to ever come up it would be my distinct honor to attend. Unless we have a game. Or practice. Or mandatory hot yoga classes (we don’t really have those).
– Chris Kluwe
p.s. If you really wanted to, I’m sure I could make a late supper if an F35 were to pick me up at the field right after practice. Just saying.
p.p.s. Please don’t do that. Then I’d be *that guy* on the team. You know. *That* guy. (Plus it also seems an unnecessary waste of taxpayer dollars. “
After being released by the Vikings in the off-season, Kluwe was signed by the Raiders. He is expected to compete with Marquette King for the starting job that opened up after Oakland’s longtime punter Shane Lechler signed with the Texans.
Does that seem like a lot of punting news? Well, if your team’s offense was as dysfunctional as the Raiders’ has been, you’d realize that punting is, as Vice-President Biden might say, “a big (blanking) deal.”