Dear Baxter, My Girlfriend is a Thief

I'm starting a new feature where I will be offering substandard advice to listeners.  if you have a question about anything, please email it to me at baxter@1037theloon.com.  our first question is from Jonathon in Sauk Rapids.

Baxter,

When the woman I’ve been seeing told me she occasionally “swipes things” from department stores, I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Then she showed me a stash in her apartment—lipsticks, perfume, compacts…all shoplifted from local department stores. She’s says it’s “harmless” and it gives her a little thrill! How is stealing anything harmless? What do I do about this? It seems like a crazy thing to break up over, right? Or is it?

Signed,

Jonathan

Okay Jonathon, I think you are missing the silver lining here.  Although, I don't condone thievery of any kind, curbing your girlfriend's petty theft affliction may be a tough road. Instead, might I suggest making the best of it.  For example, go shopping with her.  If you see something you like, just point at it and say "I would really like to have that", then tell her you will meet her in the Food Court.  There you go, Jonathon, and I hope I have been of some help.  A nice gift idea for her might be a giftcard from a local bail/bondsman.