Loon Morning Rundown: Gotta Have More Cowbell [AUDIO]

As heard on the February 9th show:

1. Porn Star or New Porsche?

Interesting choices for a work bonus, no? It's the decision that one employee of the year at a company in China will have to make. Have sex with a FAMOUS porn star or get a brand new Porsche. Well, the Porsche is bound to get you beautiful women, but famous porn star sex would secure the most amazing bragging rights.

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2. Giant Teddy Bears

Are there really full grown women who are this excited to get a giant stuffed teddy bear? Where do you put it? Cook a meal by candle light or anything else ... chocolates... roses. Please no giant teddy bears. They are desperate.

3. St. Cloud Gamer Victim of "Swatting"

It's an online "prank" that could have serious consequences. A St. Cloud gamer who streams on Twitch.TV under the handle KoopaTroopa787 was the victim of this prank last week. The 27-year-old said his little brother opened the door only to be faced with a SWAT team, guns pointed. The last person prosecuted for swatting pranks is currently facing 11 years in federal prison and he's only 19. Pretty dumb way to waste your life. Don't do it. Swatting is not funny. It is dangerous and expensive and you will be caught eventually.

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4. New App To Monitor Your Kids Behind the Wheel

Learning to drive is a big step on your way to becoming an independent adult, but it's scary letting your kids take control of the wheel. It's not an issue of trust. It's an issue of inexperience. A new app called Teen Driver Support System is in the works that warns parents of risky driving behaviors like speeding and sudden stops.

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5. Tracking Chips in Hotel Linens

You know that fluffy towel you have at home from that one really nice hotel you stayed at once. Consider yourself lucky. Hotels are getting so fed up with the amount of linens they're losing every year that some started implanting chips into the cloth.