103.7 THE LOON » funny news

Ozzy Osbourne Schedules His Lovemaking Around 'Letterman'

Jeff Giles — Tue, 27 Mar 2012 23:20:37 +0000

After spending a few seasons watching Ozzy Osbourne putter around his kitchen in ‘The Osbournes,’ we thought nothing could surprise us about the domesticated Prince of Darkness — but as it turns out, we underestimated his wife Sharon’s tendency to overshare. According to the UK’s Sun tabloid, Ozzy schedules his conjugal visits with Sharon around [...]

Fun Valentine's Day Idea — The Museum of Broken Relationships in Croatia

Amy Sciarretto — Tue, 14 Feb 2012 19:30:04 +0000

What is there to do with romantic items from past relationships, such as stuffed animals, garter belts, a prosthetic leg (more on that in a sec) or a wedding dress other than burn or toss ‘em? Send them off to the Museum of Broken Relationships in Croatia. Consider it the destination where old, no-longer-useful relationship relics go to die or at least live out the end of their “lives” with some dignity.

Cops Bust Nude Burglar Covered in Chocolate and Peanut Butter

Don Deane — Sun, 12 Feb 2012 16:05:41 +0000

On Tuesday, a naked burglar was found by workers in a Kentucky supermarket completely covered in chocolate and peanut butter. Hey, can you blame him? The two go so perfectly together. The thief, 22-year-old Andrew Toothman, was naked except for a pair of boots and had chocolate and peanut butter “smeared all over his person,” [...]

Naked Santas Aim for World Record in San Francisco

Justin Massoud — Wed, 14 Dec 2011 14:30:13 +0000

Dozens of men and women donned Santa garb on a blistery cold New York City weekend, jumped into sleighs (i.e. taxi cabs) and headed toward naughty places to drink, drank and drunk. Their holiday-spirited peers in San Francisco also did all of the above, except naked. All in the name of a world record.

Free Pot with Donation to Marijuana Dispensary Has Stoners Giving Back

Shauna Wright — Tue, 13 Dec 2011 14:25:29 +0000

Like most medical marijuana dispensaries, Granny Purps in Soquel, CA sometimes struggles with an image problem. While it genuinely believes it’s helping people, pot remains illegal at the federal level and the “stoner” culture often stigmatizes what is otherwise a legitimate operation.

However, Granny Purps is trying to redeem itself in the eyes of the public. For the second year in a row, it’s feeding the less-fortunate by offering an unusual trade — one free joint for every six cans of donated food.

Urine-Controlled Video Games Make Going to the Bathroom Not So Boring [VIDEO]

Jeremy Taylor — Wed, 30 Nov 2011 13:00:38 +0000

Guys, what’s the main problem with the bathroom? Could it be the lack of video games? A British gaming company solved this problem when it began testing a line of urinal mounted, urine-controlled video games that allow fellows to use their “joysticks” to control the action. Inferred sensors detect the direction of the player’s urine [...]