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Really, Lunchroom Massacre?

Tell me this happens at other workplaces besides mine. We had a potluck at my office on Monday and had lots of potato chips and other snacks leftover. By Tuesday afternoon, I walk into our lunchroom and people had all the bags of chips, cookies, etc open on the table.

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Really, TV Spoiler?

With our lives becoming busier and busier each day, who has time to watch TV anymore? Luckily, we can rely on our DVR, right? That’s pretty much how a majority of us are now watching TV. We have the luxury of recording it and watching it when we have free time. And we are committed to our shows and excited to watch them.

However, there’s always a jackass out there who comes up and asks,

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Really, “The World is MY Trashcan” Guy?

Dear Littering Idiot,

If you are wondering how the McDonald’s bag that you threw out of your window leaving the McDonald’s parking lot ended up in your yard, it was me.

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Really, Feces Covered Cell Phones?

Do you know how many cell phones have traces of poop on them? 1 in 6. Look up right now. You see five other people? It's probably your phone. We all know why this is happening, right?

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Really, Texting While Driving?

This could pretty much write itself, couldn’t it? I can’t even believe that I still see this out on the roads, but there it was in black and white yesterday while driving home from work. Texting and driving and this jackass lady wasn’t even trying to hide it, even though it’s illegal.

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Really? Hillbilly is a Language?

I called my dentist's office last week to make an appointment. Seems like a fairly uneventful task, right? So, I make the call and a receptionist picks up. "Hello, blah-blah Dentist office, how may I help you?"

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Getty Images
Getty Images
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Is Kristen Wiig Leaving ‘SNL’? [VIDEO]

It looks like this is true. For all you avid 'Saturday Night Live' watchers you know Kristen has been a huge part of the show for the past 7 years. But even if you don't tune in to the live sketch comedy series, you more than likely know who Kristen is from movies like 'Knocked Up' and 'Bridesmaids'.

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Los Angeles Zoo
Los Angeles Zoo
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Guns N’ Roses Rocker Slash Reveals Love for Reptiles and Betty White

While you may know former Guns N’ Roses member (and current solo artist) Slash as a guitar god, we here at TheFW appreciate his love for our slithery, scaly friends. The rocker is a longtime fan of snakes, and at one point had over 80 of them in his home. (He gave them up after the birth of his son.) And as our pals at Loudwire recently discovered, he’s also a fan of everyone’s favorite Golden Girl.

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Really? No Dumb Questions?

I was at work the other day and I heard someone say, “There’s no such thing as a dumb question.” First of all, that’s such a generic thing to say to someone. And second, what? Are you frickin’ kidding me? People ask me stupid crap all day long! Here are my experiences:

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ModelMayhem
ModelMayhem
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Miss Universe Canada Contestant Banned For Manly Reason

The pageant’s organizers admit Jenna Talackova is a “real girl,” but won’t let her in their beauty pageant because the Vancouver native was born a dude.

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Really, People Hanging Out the Window?

So the weather has gotten much nicer, right? This of course is great in almost every aspect, except one thing. Warm weather means windows open in cars and windows open in cars means it time for jackasses to hang their arms out the window.

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mcfarlandmo, Flickr
mcfarlandmo, Flickr
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How Did a Sneeze Cut Power to One Minnesota Town?

You’ve probably heard of power-walking and power-napping, but how about power-sneezing? More specifically, power outage sneezing.

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