As a Former Bartender/Liquid Pharmacist, I Had Some Pet Peeves

Many years ago I was a bartender.  I worked every kind of bar from hotels, country club and hole in the wall rock bars.  I found that no matter what your background or financial status, alcohol was the great equalizer.  A drunk is a drunk is a drunk!  Here are just some of the things that developed into pet peeves.

Non tippers or poor tippers.  The minimum tip is $1 per drink.  No change, please.

Frozen drinks.  On a busy night, nothing slows down the process like having to haul out the blender to make a frozen or ice cream drink.  If you have experienced any bad karma in your life, chances are you ordered one of these drinks on a busy night.

People who whistle to get your attention.  First of all, if you can still whistle, you are not that dry.  Treat a bartender like a dog and you'll wait extra long for service.

Be ready.  When the bartender approaches you, have your order ready.  Most bartenders will just move on to someone that's prepared to order.

Free drinks.  Women are usually the guilty ones here.  Don't hang your cleavage on the bar and give the bartender a big smile, then ask for a free drink.  All bartenders are different but with a seasoned bartender you'd better just lift your shirt.

Cut off?  You are cut off either because you are obviously hammered or just an asshole, or both.  take in stride.  Don't ask for the manager because he will only back the bartenders decision and you'll waste everyone's time.

Don't mistreat the cocktail waitress.  You're out, period.  Also, in all my years, I've never seen a waitress leave at the end of the night with a customer.  Save your breath.  She's doing the bartender.

Finally, treat your bartender and cocktail waitress with respect.  They are, after all, the gods of the liquor.