William Shatner, the iconic actor who played Captain James T. Kirk in Star Trek, has revealed that he has never even watched an episode of the sci-fi series. In honor of his 90th birthday, Shatner spoke to People about his relationship with the show, which he described as “painful” to watch at times.

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“I have never watched Star Trek,” he shared. “There are many episodes I don’t know, there are some movies I don't know.” There is one Star Trek title that Shatner has seen — Star Trek V: The Final Frontier. Why did he pick that one in particular? It’s only because he directed it. “I directed one of the movies — No. 5 — I had to watch that one,” explained Shatner. “But it's all painful because I don't like the way I look and what I do.”

It’s not uncommon for actors to get squeamish over watching themselves on camera. Their on-set performance can look and feel totally different from the final result that appears on screen. While fans nearly worship Shatner for his portrayal of Captain Kirk, the actor’s own perception of his work is entirely different.

The original Star Trek series ran for three seasons, from 1966 to 1969 on NBC. Shatner led the cast as Captain Kirk, an Iowa-born human who pilots the USS Enterprise throughout the galaxy in the year 2233. Initially, Star Trek received low viewership ratings while on NBC. But several years later, the show gained a cult following in broadcast syndication. A franchise was born, which would go on to spawn eight television series and 13 feature films.

Recently, Shatner has been busy preparing for the release of his upcoming movie Senior Moment, where he plays a retired NASA test pilot named Victor. In the film, Victor gets his license taken away after he’s caught speeding in a vintage Porsche with his old pal Sal (Christopher Lloyd). Senior Moment will be released on Friday, March 26.

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