Dear Baxter, I Can’t Keep Up with My Nympho Maniac Wife

Mr Baxter,

I've never really asked anyone for advice like this but I don't know where else to turn.  I'm an average looking middle aged guy. I've spent most of my life working and have managed to put together quite a fortune. Due to my commitment to my work, I never dated or have a relationship of any kind. About a year ago, I met a very young and attractive woman while at a coffee shop. One thing led to another and before I knew it, we were married. We actually don't see a whole lot of each other but when we are together, she is insatiable and we sometime, actually most times make love several times a day. I don't think I can keep up this pace but don't want to be alone. I have no family and without her I am all alone in this world. What can I do about this situation before it kills me.

Signed,

Carl   Sartell, MN

Carl,

Taking all the above factors into consideration, I would speculate your wife is not making love to you. She's trying to KILL YOU!  Bow out of this as soon as possible and accept whatever financial settlement results. This would be my advice unless you dread being alone so much you'd rather have your heart explode. Hope this helps, Carl.

Signed,

Baxter