Why Living In Minnesota Is Better Than Living In The South
Although I call Minnesota home now-a-days, that wasn’t always the case. I was born and raised in the mountains of Kentucky. Basically everything about southern culture is different from northern culture.
I often get asked by my fellow Minnesotans where I like living more, and my answer without hesitation is ALWAYS Minnesota. If you’re ever tempted to move down south to escape the winter, I’m telling you now don’t do it. Here are the reasons why living in Minnesota is better than living in the south.
- Education
We southerners have an unspoken rule that we are allowed to make fun of ourselves and our culture, but the second a northerner does it they’ve crossed the line. It’s because I was born a southerner that I can safely say this – but your education system is far, far better than our own.
The IQ scores reflect that. In a recent study it was shown that Minnesotans have the 2nd highest IQ scores in the country, whereas Kentucky strolls in at number 31 (pretty embarrassing for me.)
- “Front Porch Sitting” Isn’t Considered To Be A Legitimate Hobby
You’re probably a little confused about this one. Let me elaborate. See we southerners think that anything that requires us to exert any degree of physical effort is not fun. Even so much as having to put beer in the fridge is considered hard labor (take my word for it. I lived it for 20 years.)
It’s because we despise the idea of putting effort into anything, that one of the most beloved pastimes in the south is what we call “Front Porch Sitting.” Yup. It’s exactly what it sounds like. You and a couple pals sit on your front porch with a case of beer and some chewing tobacco while flying the rebel flag at full mast. We have no shame.
- You Can Understand The Minnesotan Accent
Alright, I’ll say it. You guys have some pretty goofy accents. You sound like coy little Irish elves on Christmas. It’s funny. But for the love of god, at least I can understand what you’re saying.
We southerns have audacity to throw half a can of dip in (after already having lost half of the teeth in our mouths, resulting in us sounding like we have a mouthful of food when we talk) refuse to speak in complete sentences, attempt to communicate primarily through grunts and moans, and then become irate when people can’t understand what we’re saying.
When my grandpa (from Minnesota) would come visit my family in Kentucky, he literally had to have my dad translate what people were saying for him.
All in all, I’d say I made the right move by coming to Minnesota. You are a clean, literate, and polite people. Words cannot express my gratitude.