Krissy Krabtree

Dear Littering Idiot,

If you are wondering how the McDonald’s bag that you threw out of your window leaving the McDonald’s parking lot ended up in your yard, it was me.

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Do you know how many cell phones have traces of poop on them? 1 in 6. Look up right now. You see five other people? It's probably your phone. We all know why this is happening, right?

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This could pretty much write itself, couldn’t it? I can’t even believe that I still see this out on the roads, but there it was in black and white yesterday while driving home from work. Texting and driving and this jackass lady wasn’t even trying to hide it, even though it’s illegal.

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I called my dentist's office last week to make an appointment. Seems like a fairly uneventful task, right? So, I make the call and a receptionist picks up. "Hello, blah-blah Dentist office, how may I help you?"

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I always thought that most people want to get in and out of the grocery store as quickly as possible, so when did we decide that we need to bring the entire family and make grocery shopping the biggest thing that's ever happened to your family? Does it need to be a family outing? And if grocery shopping is considered a family outing for you, well, that just sucks.

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I was at work the other day and I heard someone say, “There’s no such thing as a dumb question.” First of all, that’s such a generic thing to say to someone. And second, what? Are you frickin’ kidding me? People ask me stupid crap all day long! Here are my experiences:

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So the weather has gotten much nicer, right? This of course is great in almost every aspect, except one thing. Warm weather means windows open in cars and windows open in cars means it time for jackasses to hang their arms out the window.

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My odd trip to Walmart last Saturday started as soon as I pulled into the parking lot. I parked my car, look up and see someone pull into a handicapped spot. I watch her look around for her handicapped tag, hang it on her mirror and get out and walk into the store. Really? If anyone is reading this and doesn’t see a problem with that, you’re a jerk.

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Have you ever had someone who smokes cigarettes come up to you and say, “I wonder why I don’t feel good today?” This happened to me the other day and I’m pretty sure I just stared at the guy for about 2 minutes and said nothing.

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I've learned something recently. I've learned that people who have facebook pages for pets really piss people off. I mean really, when you think about it, you spend enough hours in the day wasting away on facebook as yourself. Do you really need to pretend to be your pet too?

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Have you ever been behind these people who are choosing or cashing in scratch-off tickets who clearly think the whole world revolves around them?

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You ever see these people who tuck everything into their pants? And unfortunately, it’s usually the people who shouldn’t be tucking in anything.

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